Friday, August 26, 2011

LIFE HAS ITS MOMENTS AND THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TIMES

Well if you all don't know I am writing finally as a fugitive from the law. I am a product of a forfeited bond having to prove my own innocence before even being found guilty in terms of ten thousand dollars to my attorney Jim Shaw to get this straightened out. Okay so with a clean hair follicle where does all the other money come in? Freedom has it's price and it isn't cheap. Not by any means. If I get caught I am rendered gone, dead, kapooey. Being in a position with no money and no one really to help me out I have taken this episode rather personally. I have vowed to myself not to give in to the weight the world can bare on one's shoulders. Just found out that now my very own sister has defriended me on facebook which to me is a pretty big slap in the face. The general consensus is that if you just ignore stuff it will eventually go away. That is never true in life but could be very well true with me. When I do go away I am afraid it will be forever so that theory is well supported in this instance. In the justice system if you don't have money you don't have a chance. Well I used to have money and lots of it but the well dried up when I decided to start doing the right thing. With the loss of financial power, the respect and any place in any social hierarchy goes with it too, which is a great loss because I am a social person and like to be around people. Generally I like to be around people who aren't secretly about to call the police on me when I leave. That doesn't make for a very good time. Things didn't turn out the way I had planned for them to, but life goes on. Unfortunately for me it comes in the form of a life sentence. Since when did the DA's office let a possession case stay out for almost 4 years if there was any inkling of a chance to win in trial? Let me answer that for you......never. There is no case and still they pursue me like I am too stupid to realize the tactics they have resorted to. No that I am not and I do realize that it is hard to be heard without some sort of financial foundation. Well things are so stressful for me right now I entertain the thought of going to turn myself in and lie at the mercy of the court every day , which is a sure fire suicide mission but I just can't do that without giving this 10 grand a run for it. I am up to 3 grand almost and I am gaining momentum. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. Its nice to know that I have family that have chosen to turn the other cheek while I fade away and that makes me all the more determined to win this bitch. I just cringe at the fact of how people claim to be these upstanding, caring, loving, forgiving people that just sit there and watch a son or brother crumble under the duress of the state. What happened to sticking together until the end? What happened to blood being thicker than water? What the fuck happened period? You know in a situation like this it's do or die literally. I am not afraid to die but how can I really be alive living like this? What am I fighting for? To get my supporting family back? No, its for Jayden Paul whom I love more than anything in this world. She has to know that whatever happens that I put up one hell of a fight and that her aunt or new mom or whatever that sicko JJ considers herself has not been fair or honest. If you have to cheat and lie to win lets turn it up a notch because if anyone out there thinks that I can't get nasty with it then they are sadly mistaken. I am being backed into a corner when there are so many other solutions than to let it get to this point. I can be the good samaritan and just let all these people gain the upper hand by lying and cheating but you know what? Fuck all that and its a damn shame that things couldn't be worked out in a civil manner. The gloves are coming off and the fight is on, there are no rules and you better best believe that I fight to win. I have been the human punching bag for way too long, you want to fuck me? Well let me pull down my pants because I am going to fuck you back 10 times as hard. Let me find out. Its time for me to reach way back in that favor book to the most terrifying people I know I have ever met and start pulling the big one. The big favor that had better be a life or death situation and here we arrive to this spot. The time is now and now is the time. Robinhoodlum shall overcome the bad and the good shall be triumphant. Let the blood spill but it wasn't because there weren't other options. There were and are. Speaking in metaphoric tones always seems to get me worked up pretty well. So there you have it. Looking for 7 grand more but Im on the work tip getting it done, hopefully before the man swarms me. I can already prove my innocence but it is so hard to be heard from a jail cell. Peace and love to the masses. Wish me luck God knows I need all I can get right now.